Why do I hurt myself?

“I cut my wrists so bad I had to get stitches. At the time, I told the doctor that I cut myself on a light bulb, which was true—I just didn’t mention that I’d done it on purpose.”—Sasha, 23.

“My parents have noticed my cuts, but only the ones that aren’t so bad and look like scrapes. . . . Sometimes they’ll see one they don’t recognize, so I make up an excuse. . . . I don’t want them to know.”—Ariel, 13.

“A Mechanism to Cope With Stress”

To those who are not acquainted with the disorder, self-injury may appear to be an attempt at suicide. But this is not usually the case. “Generally speaking, these people are trying to end just their pain, not their lives,” writes Sabrina Solin Weill, executive editor of a magazine for teens. Hence, one reference work refers to self-injury as “a ‘life preserver’ rather than an exit strategy.” It also calls the practice “a mechanism to cope with stress.” What kind of stress?

It has been found that many self-injurers have suffered some type of trauma, such as childhood abuse or neglect. For others, family conflict or the alcoholism of a parent is the factor. For some, a mental disorder is involved.

There could be other problems as well. Sara, for example, was in the throes of what she calls self-abusive perfectionism. While she had made serious mistakes and had received help from Christian elders, she felt exceedingly guilty over her daily imperfections. “I figured that I had to ‘get tough’ on myself,” Sara says. “To me, self-injury was merely self-discipline. My ‘self-discipline’ included pulling out my hair, cutting my wrists and arms, hitting myself and causing deep bruises, and sentencing myself to such punishments as keeping my hand under scalding water, sitting outside in the freezing cold without a coat, or going an entire day without eating.”

For Sara, self-injury was a reflection of a deep self-loathing. “There were times when I knew that Jehovah had forgiven me for my mistakes,” she says, “but I did not want him to. I wanted to suffer because I hated myself so much. While I knew that Jehovah could never have conceived of a place of torment like Christendom’s hell, I wanted him to invent one just for me.”

Some might wonder why such a disturbing practice has only come to light in recent decades. However, students of the Bible know that these are “critical times hard to deal with.” (2 Timothy 3:1) Thus, they are not surprised to learn that people—including youths—turn to behavior that is hard to explain.

We are living in “critical times hard to deal with.”—2 Timothy 3:1

The Bible acknowledges that “oppression may make a wise one act crazy.” (Ecclesiastes 7:7) The challenges of adolescence—in some cases, coupled with tragic life experiences—can provide the groundwork for a pattern of harmful behavior, including self-injury. A youth who feels isolated and believes that she has no one to talk to might resort to cutting in an effort to find relief. But whatever relief self-injury may seem to offer is short-lived. Sooner or later the problems return, and so does self-injury.

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